bbcovert@juno.com

Now some of you read the title and gasped, “When God says to stop homeschooling?!? Has Brenda lost her mind? Homeschooling is God’s perfect plan for everyone! There’s no quitting in homeschooling!!” I’m here to tell you that yes, there is, and for someone who planned to homeschool both children all the way to a homeschool high school diploma, this has been quite a revelation.

I’m a single, work-from-home parent with two teenagers whom I’ve been educating at home for ten years. One is a compliant child who doesn’t need me to tell her what to do and when to do it. She is self-motivated to finish her schoolwork and chores so that she can enjoy free time. She and I are continuing with the home education process.

The other is my oppositional child who does not want to be told what to do or when to do it, and who has been completely unmotivated to complete his schoolwork or chores, no matter what the punishment is for noncompliance. Just as a mule can plow a field with the mildest of guidance from the farmer, my son should be able to complete his lessons with the mildest of guidance from me. Unfortunately, this past year saw the farmer dragging the mule through the fields daily in an attempt to get the field plowed. As you can imagine, the field was a mess, and both the farmer and the mule were frustrated and angry. I had explained to him at the beginning of the year that if he didn’t take 9^th grade at home seriously, he would be repeating it at a public school. He promised to take it seriously. He did not follow through.

At one time the thought of putting either of my children into a traditional school system appalled me. Not MY children, I thought. God made a way for me to homeschool even after my husband abandoned us, and I felt confident that homeschooling through high school was the goal. However, I had not counted on my son’s increasing hostility and lack of concern for his responsibilities. The closeness we once shared through homeschooling had slipped out of our grasp, and even professional counseling sessions didn’t help.

I cried and pleaded with God to change my son’s heart. My deepest desire was to see him graduate at a homeschool graduation ceremony. I imagined all the exciting learning experiences we could have if his attitude towards work changed. However, nothing happened. So you understand the serious nature of our problem, I’ll tell you that our counselor suggested that I send my son away before things could get worse.

Because decisions and processes take time, I went ahead and enrolled my son in public school while waiting for God to direct me toward either a wilderness camp or a home for at-risk teens. My son was sullen and unhappy about attending school, as well as a bit scared. I feared the worst – fights, defiance in the classroom, detention, suspension, and expulsion. His counselor was also pessimistic about his chances of success.

God gave me peace about the school issue, even though I expected no good to come of it. Wonder of wonders -- my son stepped up to the plow that first day of school. His counselor and I underestimated him. He is plowing the field of education and tells me that he feels like an adult! To the shock of everyone who knows him, he brings his homework home and finishes it. He follows school rules. He has found a Christian math teacher and made some friends. He is acting more mature than he ever did at home.

For us, transferring from homeschool to public school has been a transition toward adulthood. Because he had not attended school since K4, high school feels like college to my son. At first he was fearful of the challenge, but now he has embraced it. He likes to wear his “Jesus” t-shirts to school to share his faith. He tells me that when they have the Pledge of Allegiance and a moment of silence at the beginning of school, he uses the silence to pray. As a bonus, our relationship is improving.

You see, God is not just in the home. He is in the public school as well. Every teen who has trusted Jesus has access to Him no matter where that teen is. We have to remember that Jesus is our salvation – not homeschooling, no matter how many opportunities it provides.

I prayed and asked for God’s help. He answered that prayer – just not in the way I expected. It’s okay. I still get to homeschool my daughter, and this year I finally have the freedom to work on more feminine courses with her. Then when my son gets off the bus, he and his sister and I enjoy a conversation about his day.

When God says to stop homeschooling, it’s for a purpose. Question it if you must, but obey as well. To continue homeschooling because you believe in it is in effect saying that you worship homeschooling over God. Is that what you want to teach your children? God must come first, and His will be done.

Enjoy your season of homeschooling!

Copyright 2007 by Brenda B. Covert